Fucked Up Thing About Utah #4.

Okay Mormons, enough with the no caffeine thing. Worst rule ever. This state has very few coffee places, I think I've seen maybe one drive thru coffee stand. Coming from Oregon where there is one every 5 or so blocks, this is killing me. I am a huge iced chai fan. I would go to Dutch Bros. or the Human Bean several times a week, get my chai, and be on my way. I'm not a huge fan of Starbucks (because their chai tastes like asshole) but they do have a couple here so I caved and got a chai because my craving was so bad I was about to kick babies. So I get an iced chai and it was about 90% milk. Gross. I ended up tossing it out. Later, I came across another random coffee shop and tried again. They made me a hot chai and added ice cubes. Umm...what? Iced chai is not a difficult concept. It's approx. half chai and half milk but apparently math is really hard in Utah or something. Luckily, I have recently discovered that Wal Mart sells Oregon Chai so I will be making my own iced chais at home. 

Cata Release.

Hello world, sorry I've been MIA. You see, Cataclysm came out on the 7th and Jake and I went and stood in an absurdly long line at GameStop to pick up our copies at midnight. We haven't been seen since. No search parties please, we've returned, and yes, it was everything I'd hoped it would be. Cata is awesome! It's so fun and makes the game feel brand new again. There is so much to do I didn't even know where to start. So I went to the brand new underwater zone and got a seahorse mount and rode my seahorse around at 450% mount speed. Hell yeah! 

Making Music.

This is one of the coolest things I've seen in awhile. 

Baby Lana.

I have the cutest niece ever. I mean, she is freaking adorable. My mom and sister send me pictures of her and they brighten my day every single time. For more Lana adorableness visit my sister's blog. 

Christmas Yarn Wreath.

So, my sister posted about these cute yarn wreaths. The instructions are here. I made a Christmas one. The flowers are super easy to make so I'm going to make a ton, in different colors and put them on head bands, and pins to wear as a brooch. They'd look super cute on a cardigan. Yeah, they're that cute. 
We still have to get something so I can hang this on our door. Our door is metal so you can't really pound a nail into it. 

Christmas Cooking.

So, I had my mom send me a couple of recipes for my favorite Christmas food and from there it spiraled out of control. Jake and I went shopping to get the ingredients and he kept getting ideas for other things he wanted me to make. Haha, I ended up cooking until 1 in the morning, it was fun. 
I don't like white chocolate but Jake was stoked for these pretzels. Something about the sweet and salty together. That's why I just eat a bag of potato chips after gorging on reese's pb cups. I guess he doesn't know that little trick yet. 
Batch number one of Chex Mix. Batch number two came out a lot better. Not enough seasoning on batch one. 
This is Jake's mom's food processor/mixer/blender from 1970. It's like, a super early version of a Kitchen Aid. By the way, I want a Kitchen Aid, hardcore. I never thought about buying one because they're super expensive but Jake actually brought up getting me one. I don't need it anytime soon but I'm definitely hitting him up on that one in the future. There are about a zillion colors to choose from, that will be tough. Anyway, this is cookie dough for the oatmeal choc. chip cookies I made, but I forgot to take a picture of the finished product. 

Who knew muddy buddies are ridiculously easy to make? It involves microwaving chocolate chips and that's about the hardest part. They're so yummy too! 
Batch two of Chex Mix. Well, really this is batch one with a makeover. I cooked it again with extra extra seasoning for Jake and he had me put it in a bag so he could hide it from everyone else and not share. It's a little on the salty side for my taste. 

Umm...What the Hell?

So, I understand that everyone likes to decorate their tree differently, and some people do themes and what not. I actually don't mind the bird shown above, it came in a fairly pretty gold color but what the hell is up with the doll heads? Who decorates their tree with freaking doll heads?
I'm guessing this is an old person thing? Maybe? I hope.

Photos of Utah.

Technically, this might not be Utah. It was on the drive back from Havasu, when we were driving at about 1 mile per hour. 
Yeah, this happens everywhere. On houses, underneath cars. It's kind of creepy because I always think one is going to fall and impale me through the eye or something when I'm looking up at it. 
This was the view I was met with on my craft store quest. Have I mentioned that Mormon women are obsessed with crafts? There are craft stores everywhere. Literally, I drive by 3 or 4 a day. It's insane. It'd be fine except all I needed was some damn felt and all the crazy Momo ladies bought out all the Christmas colored felt in 3 stores. THREE stores. What the hell? Crazies. 

The London Bridge.

Other than lots of old people, Lake Havasu City has the London Bridge. Yep, from London. When the bridge was being replaced in 1968 in England, they disassembled it piece by piece, every granite brick was numbered and was then reassembled in Lake Havasu across a man made canal exactly the same as it was in London. This is the second most visited tourist attraction in Arizona, right behind the Grand Canyon. 
We fed some birds too, like we used to do when I was a kid at Mingus Park. Except that these birds weren't rabid and covered in slime. 
Around the bridge is a little tourist village that has a bunch of souvenir shops. This one had a cute door, but all the stuff inside was crap. You know, bumper stickers and shot glasses. There was a candle factory though that was pretty cool if you like candles. They make really elaborate candles right there in front of you. I'm not much of a candle fan. My mom was really paranoid about fire when we were kids and she passed on her dislike of candles to me. Plus, most candles smell like ass. I prefer Bath & Body Works' wallflower smelly things. They smell so good and are about half the price right now during Christmas. I just went and stocked up yesterday. 

Whimsical Art.

I saw this image and I absolutely love it. In fact, I love pretty much all of the art in this shop. Her style is adorable.

That print reminded me of a book I read awhile ago and have passed along to my sister. It definitely isn't the greatest book I've ever read but Hector and the Search for Happiness was cute. Hector is a psychiatrist from France (the author is apparently also a psychiatrist) who is wondering what makes people happy. In his search he travels the world, finding questions and some answers. He has a one night stand with a call girl, he gets accidentally kidnapped, and he has other misadventures on his search. This is a little book, it only takes a couple hours to read, great for a wait at the doctor's office or if any of you are subjecting yourself to the TSA, for a flight. The thing about it though is that it's written in a childlike prose which can get a little annoying after awhile, and Hector is pretty naive, so it's good that the book isn't long. If it were longer, it'd stop being charming and start being really annoying. Overall, it's like a self help book on the lite side.

party hat.

I'm not sure why this hat would ever be necessary in Arizona. It's nearing the end of Nov. and is still 65 degrees outside. I think I would make a great lumberjack though and therefore believe I should go back and spend the 10 dollars on this hat. Plus, it would be perfect for Utah's weather where it's snowing already and it matches my coat. 

Kingman, AZ.

Jake and I are down in Lake Havasu City, Arizona visiting his sister and her family for Thanksgiving. Today we went to nearby Kingman so I could buy a new power cord for my laptop and to run some other errands. We were going to stop by an animal sanctuary but it's closed on Tuesday of all days so we're going to go back on Friday. Anyway, we ate some of the worst "Mexican" food I've ever had in my life at El Palacio. Seriously, if you ever happen to be in Kingman, avoid that place like you would the plague.

After lunch we stopped by a museum we had noticed that is all about Route 66. It had the cool little miniature towns that are seen below. There were also some photos by a local photographer and a gift shop that was clearly geared toward the elderly. I haven't seen anyone under the age of 65 wear a visor in years, especially one that had a license plate design all over it. Yay for sequins. 

Someone has a lot more patience than I to make these things.

They should probably dust them once a decade though, you know, to keep them looking fresh.

half birthday.

Speaking of birthdays, my half birthday was on the 20th. Jake took me to see Harry Potter 7 and I got these awesome cupcakes. There was more frosting than cake, just how I like it. I love cupcakes, but only if they're chocolate cake. White cake is a waste of time. 

I love my half birthday. It's awesome! 

I also got a new tomtom gps from my mama. More on that later. 

Happy Birthday Brookie!

My sister turned 30 years old on the 18th. She is now officially old as fuck. Happy Birthday sissy. I've figured out what I'm getting her but she doesn't get it for awhile for two reasons. One being that I don't have a job, and two is that it's a Birthday/Christmas gift. 

card found here. 

The Fancy Lamb.

The Fancy Lamb is an etsy shop that sells all kinds of awesome vintage items. Below are a few of my favorites. 

Potato ricer.

Candy cane striped mugs.

Book spines.

Soup mugs.

Snakeskin Samsonite Suitcase.

Cake carrier.

Metal scale. 

Framed print. 

HP 7 Part 1. Harry Potter, Bitches!

In order to get ready to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1, I watched all of the previous movies and re-read the Deathly Hallows book. It is still my favorite Harry Potter book, I love the final fight at the end, when the castle helps defend against Voldemort. Anyway, the movie was great, and I understand that they have to leave things out so that the movie won't end up being 7 zillion hours long, but having just read the book, it made me sad. Plus, they completely change a lot of things, it kind of pissed me off. 

Aside from the movie, the theater in Ogden was super cool. It has assigned seating, like a concert though, which was weird. Every other theater I've been in is a first come, first serve deal. Anyway, the cool thing about this theater is that they have a food court and you can take your food into the movie with you. So we got some mini Pizza Hut pizzas and a quesadilla and enjoyed our movie. 

I must say though that I have been to one theater that was even cooler, it had couches and ottomans and served alcohol. Thanks for that experience, little brother. 

EDIT: I forgot to mention there was a vendor at the theater selling wands. I seriously considered purchasing one and then remembered that I can make my own. Hell yeah! Now who has a phoenix feather I can use for the core?

Door to Door Atheists.

This is a video of Australian filmmaker John Safran going around Salt Lake City knocking on doors of Mormons and sharing Atheism. Mainly because he's past being annoyed with all the Momos knocking on his door and preaching their craziness. I mean really, it's obnoxious. At least Jake and I don't have to deal with them. They stopped by here once, he answered the door, they saw his tattoos, said something about repenting and having them removed, he said no and they've never been back. I guess they know a lost cause when they see one. Lucky for them they got Jake because he was a lot nicer than I would've been. 

Thanks for the link, Buzzy. 

The TSA Gets a Little Handsy.

So if you watch the news or read any kind of online anything that talks about the news on occasion, you will most likely have seen that the interwebz and a lot of the nation is up in arms over the new TSA security measures at airports. Basically, you either have to be zapped by the backscatter machine that shows an image of a person's body underneath their clothes, they see all your bits, or you have to agree to a pat down, complete with ball touching. If you get chosen for the backscatter machine you can opt out but you are required to get the invasive pat down or you don't get to fly. 

I find this completely ridiculous. The TSA has not caught a single terrorist from pre-flight screening, not one. There are potential health risks with the machines, and nobody knows what kind of damage they might do to the human body later on. 

Anyway, as someone who has been flying a lot recently and enjoys my personal rights, I've written my congressman, senator and signed a petition to end this nonsense. Visit www.flywithdignity.org for more information on the backscatter machines, the new rules, and the TSA. 

Ahi Loves Catnip like Miley Cyrus Loves the Cock.

My beloved cat, Ahimsa, hasn't had much experience with catnip. Most of her toys are little balls that make noise, not those catnip stuffed mice. Catnip affects about 50% of cats, and apparently my fluffy little hairball is one of them. Jake had some in a little pile that his cats like to eat. Ahi jumped right in and rolled around in the stuff. Once sufficiently coated she came and jumped on my freshly laundered clothing. Gee thanks. Good thing she's cute. I've been wanting to start an herb garden and since Nepeta cataria (catnip) is an herb, maybe I'll grow some for Miss Ahimsa.

Didn't You Know...

hangers = love. Last time I was in Utah I went to Wal Mart specifically to buy hangers and they only had white. I hate white hangers, talk about boring. So while I was in Oregon stressing out and trying to get ready to move, Jake was out buying me an assortment of pretty hangers. I like the yellow color the best. 

Utah.

My photo is a little blurry, I was hanging out a window going 75 mph. That's okay, every photo of Utah could be blurry and you wouldn't be missing much. 
The clouds were really pretty here. If they were a little bit darker and full of unrelenting rain, it would've reminded me of home. 

Home, Home on the Range.

Here are some photos of the area near Jake's hometown of Dietrich, Idaho. His hometown boasts a little market that sells deep fried burritos, and a tiny tiny tavern. That is all. There's not even a gas station. Oh, but there is a giant Momo church (that's how I'm referring to the Mormons from now on). I'm pretty sure the church can hold more people than live in the area. 

Shark Bites.

Today Jake and I went to Shark Bites Seafood Cafe for lunch. Even though I've heard amazing things about it I've never been before because this crazy chick used to work there and I didn't want any saliva in my food. She's moved her angry, fat, leprechaun ass out of town so now I'm free to eat as I please. 

Jake got the halibut tacos which come with chips and salsa and black beans. He said they were really good, especially the beer battered halibut, but he thought the salsa was lacking. I tried it, it was good but not spicy at all, it was the super mild version of salsa. The black beans though were phenomenal. I don't know what they cooked them it but it was so yummy. 

I had the tomato bisque soup and a salad. Let me tell you, that was the best tomato soup I have ever had, hands down. It was so yummy I ate it all and wanted more. 

Aside from the food, this place is really cute. They have burlap coffee bags all along one of the walls as a sort of wallpaper, and glass floats hanging in the window. They aren't solely a restaurant though. They also have a surf shop in the back where you can get a board and wetsuit. 
This is the owner in the new fresh seafood market they opened. It's a cool idea but at the same time, you can walk right down on the boardwalk and buy it straight from the fishermen if you want to. That's what is cool about living on the coast, direct access. 

Backseat Blues Part Deux.

Remember this post? Well, I'm moving to Utah tomorrow so I figured I should probably finish the cleaning out of the inside of my car (obviously I am not a procrastinator). Here is what was in there. 4 boxes and bags of canned goods from the Aunties, 3 bags of old homework from college, random books, a box of clothes, and my canning pot. Oh, and a bag of twinkle lights and glass jars from my sister's wedding over a year ago. woot! Now to pack it full of shit again, hopefully in a more organized manner.