Nina Simone

It's my first day being unemployed! I've been very productive. I found my passport, replaced my missing drivers license, and have been dancing to this song while doing laundry all day! I love it!

I am an Aunt!

Yesterday my sister had her first child, a little girl who she and Raf named Solana Mei. Mei is a family name. Both of my Aunties and my Grandma had it as their middle name. Anyway, she is super cute but I'll wait until my sister posts on her blog before I post any pictures. I can't wait to go see her in October. She's so sweet. Congrats Brooke and Raf, love you guys!! 

To Do.

I've been really stressed lately trying to get things organized and taken care of for work, school, and my move but my to do list is getting shorter so I'm much happier. Recently I have:

• Ordered my textbooks, they were very inexpensive this term (less than $200) so I was ecstatic.
  
• Paid tuition.
• FINALLY hired someone for my job, and he's intelligent and has a good memory like I do. I think he'll do great, which I was really hoping for.
• Found someone to watch my car in Portland instead of having to leave it at the airport at $20 a day. That's freaking ridiculous. 

Things I'm still stressed about:

• The 14 hour drive to Utah, and how my cat will handle it. She meowed incessantly on a 3 hour car ride, I was going to kill her. 
  
• Fitting all my shit in my car. I drive an Aveo, I'll take pictures, don't worry.
  
• Finding a job once I'm there. Hopefully one I don't absolutely hate. 
  
• Living with people. My last cohabitation experience was pretty awful. But I still refer to my old roommate as Sandy Vagina Frankie so at least there's that.

Also, I've loved Monet's water lillies since I was a little girl. They are so calming and beautiful. 

Cat.

I got a kitten yesterday. I didn't really want a kitten but I couldn't let him go to the shelter. This is why people need to stop being so damn irresponsible and get their cats spayed or neutered. A lot of places will do it at a very inexpensive price. Anyway, I named him Riff after Riff Raff and since Jake already has a cat named Rocky, they go together wonderfully!  

Also...

Perhaps it's just me but Pepe LePew seems like he's well on his way to being a rapist in this cartoon. 

le you sound like a moron.

I just logged on to facebook to see that 3 of my friends posted something with the words "le sigh" in it. I'm sorry but this is one of the more irritating popular phrases that people use right now. It's used to signify disappointment, as though you were actually sighing. Now, these people who are posting it I love dearly, and they are intelligent people so why on earth are they using a phrase from a cartoon skunk, and an obnoxious cartoon skunk at that? I realize that this has been popularized on the internet but it still sounds moronic. I'm sorry dear friends, but I thought you needed to know. 

Fucked Up Thing About Utah #2

3.2% by weight, 4% by volume, that's the alcohol content of their beer. Umm..what?! I have beer in my fridge right now that is over 10% alc/vol. Apparently you can only buy beer at convenience stores until 1 am. You can get stronger beer at liquor stores or restaurants with liquor licenses but they can't sell any on Sunday. Apparently beer over 4% alc/vol is considered liquor. This state is so batshit. According to wikipedia, "Utah has the lowest per capita consumption of alcohol in the United States"

It's so weird to me since Oregon is full of breweries that make amazing beer, and I love beer. I guess I should probably stock up now and pack my car full of beer rather than clothes. I'll probably need it more with all the crazy Utahns. Yes, Utahns. 

Pity Party.

My boss is trying to throw himself a pity party because he has to work open to close for 22 days straight because I'm leaving. I don't feel bad, I gave him a month and a half of notice. It's not my fault he waits until the last second to hire a person. I have 8 days of work and we're still waiting on a background check for the new person. So at best I'll have 6 days training him. My job is not a job that can be learned in 6 days and to be quite honest, my boss only has a vague idea of all the things I do. So, if I don't train this guy, he's going to have to figure it all out himself, which will mean a lot of phone calls from corporate telling him he didn't do something, or that he did it wrong. Nobody wants to start a new job and be told they're wrong all the time. Anyway, I wish my boss wasn't such a depressed person who likes others to feel bad for him because he's screwing over everyone else who works in the store too. 

Seven Things.

I got a challenge from thetsaritsasez to do a vlog (video blog) where I talk about 7 things about myself. Then I'm supposed to pass it on to other blogs but I hate chain mail so I'll end the cycle here. You should go check out her blog though. It's fun, she's a young writer living in the San Francisco area and she just published her very first zine. By the way, I've never made a video before on my computer. Macs have a bunch of different programs to make videos. It's rather annoying actually. Let's see if this even works. 

Fucked Up Thing About Utah #1

Death by firing squad? What the fuck, seriously? After the suspension on capital punishment ended in 1976 only one state has stuck with this archaic way of killing a person, oh Utah. I mean, even your backwoods cousin, Idaho, has decided to outlaw this. So in June of this year, Utah executed it's 3rd person in this manner. I guess he asked to be killed in this way because of all of the speculation around lethal injection being inhumane. How about this, let's just stop killing people until we find a way that is humane, but is it really ever humane to kill someone?  

Edit:

Apparently you can no longer choose death by firing squad in Utah unless you were sentenced to death before 1984. It's not outlawed exactly but lawmakers have made lethal injection the default way to kill a person. Unless of course you were sentenced before that came into effect, then you get to choose for yourself. 

Haha the batshit crazy right wing religious propaganda spewing Fox News had this to say:

"Historians say the firing squad persisted in Utah long after the rest of the nation abandoned it because of the 19th century doctrine of the state's predominant religion. Early members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints believed in the concept of "blood atonement" -- that only through spilling one's own blood could a condemned person adequately atone for their crimes and be redeemed in the next life."

It must be coherent because it's in text and not coming out of the mouth of one of their idiot "news" anchors. 

Rocky Horror Picture Show!

I went and saw Rocky Horror Picture Show at the Egyptian the other night. The Egyptian is an old theater that used to show new movies but went out of business and now the city or something owns it and shows old movies. So far I've seen Willow and Monty Python there as well. I love Rocky Horror. The theater was great, they gave everyone rice, toast and cards to throw and newspapers to hold over our heads while they sprinkled water on us from the balcony. Everyone was yelling at the screen, as expected, but there was one guy who was really into it. He was dressed up as Meatloaf's character, Eddie, and had a smart ass remark for basically every line in the movie. It was hilarious and awesome! Can't wait for the next time! 

I can't help but love Dr. Frank-N-Furter when he's singing the Sweet Transvestite song. It's so great, I can't look away. 

Riff Raff and Magenta are definitely my favorite though. 

Highlights!!

• I only have 9 days of work left!! This is awesome as every single day I feel like leaving. However, they haven't hired my replacement. I feel so bad for my co-workers once I'm gone. It's going to be chaos. 
  
• Someone thought I was 16 yesterday. I have decided that this is a good thing, even if 16 was a full 8 years ago. Or maybe it's a bad thing because it means I'm pimply and awkward? damn it!
  
• The gift I ordered for my dad's 75th birthday finally got here which is awesome since the first one I ordered was discontinued, even though it was from the company's 2010 catalog. What the fuck?!
  
• Yes, my dad is going to be 75. 
  
• I signed up for Mint.com due to my sister's suggestion. It's fucking awesome. I love it. You should definitely check it out to manage your finances. I like the goals section. 
  
• It's football season, leave me the fuck alone and GO JETS!!
  

Again? Is that really necessary?

breakup card found here. 

So I have this friend who has recently reunited with his ex...for the fourth time. Now, this is not a tempestuous on and off again kind of thing with stormy fights and hot makeup sex. This is a slow, boring, would rather stab myself in the ears repeatedly with a dull object than have to listen to him talk about it anymore kind of thing. I mean really, 6 years, 4 breakups and 3 engagement rings later and this time it's "different." Does that mean you're not going to buy her another engagement ring this time? I mean, come on people, everyone knows you have a two breakup rule. You are allowed to break up and get back together once. If you breakup again, then it is the end. I'll listen to you be sad through two breakups. After that, shut your pie hole. Stop being an emotional cutter and move on. This is the saddest case of codependency I've ever seen. He can't function on his own and has no idea how the world works. The guy can't even balance a checkbook and when he made his budget for living on his own, part of his budget was "strip clubs." As for her, I've never met anyone with lower self esteem in my life. From now on I've decided to be super obnoxious every time he says anything about their relationship and do the "talk to the hand" thing people used to do in middle school. I hope he gets it quickly because I will annoy myself with that.  

The Monarques

http://intothewoods.tv/mfnw/episode-8>

This was posted on a friend's facebook the other day. It's of the Portland based band The Monarques playing some songs on the MAX, which is the public transportation. I wish there was a cool band playing songs when I was on the MAX, instead it was just a bunch of creepy people who had just gotten off work. The girl with the curly hair is from North Bend, Or. The music put me in a good mood. I couldn't get the code to embed the video to work so you're going to have to click on the link. 

Macy's Blows.

So my Macy's payment was due the other day. I work three stores down from Macy's but since I had just signed up on their website for paperless statements I decided to pay online rather than walk my happy ass down there. WORST IDEA EVER!! First of all, you can't use a debit card, you have to use a check. ugh. Apparently they're old school at Macy's. Then because it's a check, it takes 3 to 4 days to process but they at no time tell you this, or if they did, I didn't notice it. What the hell? I've done my part Macy's, hurry the fuck up. So this morning on a national fucking holiday I get a call at 9 am that they haven't received my payment. They woke me up, I'm super confused and have no idea what the hell is going on. As far as I'm concerned, I paid the fucking bill. The guy isn't getting anywhere with me and gets frustrated and hangs up. Whatever, fine with me. Then they proceed to call me every 45 min to an hour even though I've already explained to the first guy probably 30 times that as far as I'm concerned the bill is paid and he can suck a dick. So I answer and piss another one off so he hangs up on me too. Then I get another call, I'm at work, I ignore it and then call back. This lady is a bitch and I was a bitch right back. I used some colorful language, spoke to her as though she was a five year old, and asked for her supervisor. I swear they listen to you while they put you on hold because she tried to put me on one of those indefinite holds and I eventually said, "they can make me wait all god damned day long, I don't give a fuck, I have speaker phone, it won't hold up my day at all" and I immediately got a supervisor who OH MY GOSH GUESS WHAT could refund the late fee they charged me but only after being a total prick. Wow, really? I'm supposed to thank you for that after the last 3 people I talked to were complete fucktards? They have some of the worst customer service I have ever come across and I will not be shopping at Macy's again for quite some time, if ever. 

tl;dr - Macy's customer service reps are a bunch of douchebags. 

Oh I left out the part where I threatened to call them every hour on the hour until they agreed to remove the late fee. I think that's what did it.

Oh Anthro.

Do you see those yellow shoes? Oh Anthro, why must you always send me such pretty pictures in your catalog? You're killin' me smalls!!

16 more days!

You know how in high school you get "senioritis" about halfway into your senior year? Well I have the same symptoms regarding my job. The moment I gave notice it became excruciatingly painful to get out of bed to come to work. I don't want to be here anymore and I have a mental countdown to my last day. I can't freaking wait! Although, I do really like our latest hire so it's not too bad when I work with her. She's entertaining and thinks I'm hilarious. Bonus points for her. 

Taylor Swift.

Fucking bitch. Everything she does is adorable. This has got to be the sweetest little video ever and I want every single outfit she wears in it, especially that headband. 

Boyfriend.

This is my boyfriend. His name is Jake. Yes, it's kind of new, not so new that I couldn't have written about him before. I was just making you wait, although you didn't know it at the time.
Yes, you're correct, he is very cute. He's also a string of other nice words, the usual, typical, and some even better than that.